1. When I was younger, I used to get Michael Jackson and Michael Jordan mixed up. xD

 

2. I love to eat pisang goreng, but after so many years of BM tatabahasa, I still call it goreng pisang if I don't stop to think beforehand.

3. I have this abnormal affinity for pretty plastic bags, and when I was younger I used to steal crisp, new ones if I had the chance to. xD My darkest secrets revealed!

4. I have a very low tolerance for stubborn ignorance and disrespect and laziness at someone else's expense.

5. In my entire school-life, very rarely have people been able to pronounce my chinese name properly, and that is the reason why before every prize-giving ceremony or public speaking competition, I have to beg the emcees beforehand to just call me "May Yap".

6. Boon Ting Fish Keropok. Mr Potato Chips (tomato flavour!). Dried peaches. 'Nuff said.

7. I can live without water. =P

8. I can't mask my feelings well courtesy of my facial betrayal, and people can read me like a book. But when they can't, it's scary for them. =P

9. I used to be funny.

10. I believe in consistent studying so I don't have to be stressed out during exams. xD Plus, I value crystallized knowledge.

11. People think I'm passionate, but I view myself as very dispassionate. Even though I love reading, my desire to read is easily curbed and altogether controllable. For example, since everyone says that Breaking Dawn sucks, I don't have any plans in the near future to read it. =P I can live without a lot of things, like the TV and my handphone.

12. French fries taste wrong with anything other than tomato sauce, with the exception of cheese. xD

13. I still baby-talk with Lara. It's an incurable habit. She will "always be my baby". *goofy grin*

14. My mum thinks I am very unvain for a 17-year-old girl. Hahaha.

15. I have taken back so many of my words in the past one year that it's positively embarrassing. Hehe.

 

I will tag you, but it's your mission only IF you choose to accept it. Dun have to gimme face if you duwan. =P *Scrolls down blogroll*

1. Jia Wern

2. Eddie

3. Rachelle

4. Sheng Han

5. Sidney

6. Elyssa

7. Are these my only friends? Where have all the rest gone to? Get a blog! =P

"Acts of love? That's another problem, and what a problem! You see, I love mankind so much that, believe it or not, there are moments when I would like to give up everything, abandon Lise, and become a hospital nurse. I close my eyes and let my imagination wander, and during those minutes I feel an irresistable strength within me. No wounds, no infected sores, however terrible, could frighten me away then. I would clean them with my own bare hands. I would look after those sufferers. I would be ready to kiss their sores..."

 

"It is good that you should think of these things rather than others...But if would be very nice if you actually performed some good deed."

 

"Yes, but how long do you think I could live such a life?" Mrs Khokhlakov said heatedly, an almost hysterical note creeping into her voice. "That's the crucial point! Yes, that's the question that torments me most. I close my eyes and I ask myself : 'How long do you think you could endure that life? What if a patient, whose sores you were cleaning, instead of being grateful to you, tormented you with his whims and had no appreciation whatsoever for your services to mankind, or even complained about you to your superiors, as people in pain so often do? What would happen then? Would you go on loving him or not?' And I must tell you that, to my own dismay, I have come to this conclusion : If anything could dampen my 'active love' for mankind, it is ingratitude. In other words, I'm willing to work if I'm paid for it. But I want to be paid at once. I mean I want to be praised and paid for love with love. Otherwise, I'm quite incapable of loving anyone."

 

She seemed to be in a paroxysm of sincere self-deprecation and as she finished, there was a challenge to the elder in her eyes.

 

"That's exactly what a doctor told me quite some time ago," the elder remarked. " He was not a young man and he was certainly intelligent. He was just as sincere as you are, although he spoke in an amused tone, with a sort of bitter humour. 'I love mankind,' he said, 'but I find to my amazement that the more I love mankind as a whole, the less I love individual people. In my thoughts,' the doctor told me, 'I often visualize ecstatically the sacrificies I could make for mankind and, indeed, I might even accept martyrdom for my fellow men if circumstances suddenly demanded it of me. In actual fact, however, I cannot bear to spend two days in the same room with another person. And this I know from personal experience. Whenever someone is too close to me, I feel my personal dignity and freedom are being infringed upon. Within twenty-four hours, I can come to hate the best of men, perhaps because he eats too slowly or because he has a cold and keeps blowing his nose. I become a man's enemy,' he said, 'as soon as he touches me. But to make up for it, the more I hate individual people, the more ardent is my love for mankind.'

 

[Excerpt from The Brothers Karamazov by Fyodor Dostoevsky]

 

It is indeed easier to die for someone than to live for someone, or with someone. And that reasoning is the source of cold detachment I feel at times regarding saving animal lives or putting my entire heart and soul into a project.

 

Can you live with the consequences? Can you?

So I got Pelajar Contoh Akademik this year. Note the "AKADEMIK", meaning I didn't get the even more coveted Pelajar Contoh title. Which also means I'm only second best if you view it in a holistic manner. =P But I don't mean to sound ungrateful. I thank God for being gracious to me. =)

 

Eddie got this particular award last year, and my brother the year before. So that means my name will be up there with Eddie's and Ray's on the Pelajar Contoh Akademik plaque. The pressure of keeping up the family tradition has finally descended upon my sister. xD

 

Some call it a blessing, but according to Eddie, there's this mysterious curse associated with the recipients of this prestigious award - for the past 3 years or so, NOT A SINGLE ONE managed to get straight A1s. Yes, you didn't hallucinate. Not a single Pelajar Contoh Akademik has ever gotten straight A1s before, whereas the ones who didn't get it (ie, second or third place in class) always turned out to do better in the actual SPM examination, for example, Kong Min and Yi Leng last year.

 

*gulps*

 

However, I must add that if the curse is still effective, that's not going to be very surprising considering my A2 in BM and my B in Add Maths up till now. =P

 

Yeah, dungu dungu. However, today I will not harp on my failures, but instead be proud of myself. At least I'm getting Best Subject for 6 subjects, including all the sciences, English, EST and History. A total of Rm 30 for Best Subjects. How many schools pay you for doing well, anyway? =P

 

Somehow, there's this nagging thought at the back of my mind that if I went to St Teresa or any other MORE prestigious school, I wouldn't have these bragging rights at all.

 

How come I always fail when I want to feel proud of myself? Must be the curse of the blessed. =P